It’s All About The Tubesteak

The Guardian’s Oliver Burkeman reports in G2 on the Burger King Quad Stacker and the recent US phenomenon of ‘politically incorrect’ fast food. In a generally interesting post Burkeman takes several paragraphs to expound on received wisdom from fast food industry insiders and food pyschologists on portion size expectations, before he gets to the money paragraph:

[…]

Of course, you could argue that there is a refreshing honesty in products such as the BK Stacker Quad – it’s a fatty pile of meat, and doesn’t pretend otherwise – and there’s some evidence that this approach is gaining a foothold elsewhere in the consumer economy. The best example is probably a US television ad for Hummer, the manufacturer of preposterous, lumbering, military-style SUVs, which non-owners like to explain as compensating for their owners’ feelings of inferior manhood. (You can watch the ad online at tinyurl.com/mea23.) In the first scene, a man is at the supermarket checkout, buying tofu, carrots and soy. A second man arrives in the queue behind him, with a trolley full of meat and barbecue supplies.

The first man, looking queasy and insecure, completes his purchase, then immediately drives to a Hummer dealership, where he buys a massive new vehicle. “Restore the balance”, the on-screen slogan reads. The man drives off, secure at last in his masculinity.

[…]

Read whole article…

Oy. Refreshing honesty? Hardly. Try deep political cynicism

Is there anything in the US marketing strategy playbook that isn’t about male impotence? It seems to me that the ad, the product it promotes and its competitors from the likes of Hardees are precisely micro-targeted. The fast-food chains certainly know their constituency – male Bush voters and wingnut bloggers, NASCAR Dads and Fox News viewers – and they’re blatantly and cynically taking advantage of the idiocy diplayed therein to to boost the profits of a flagging industry.

Hardees even sells a Low-Carb Thickburger ( see below) to which the only reaction is – WTF?

Description: The Low Carb Thickburger maintains the same substantial 1/3-pound Angus beef hamburger patty as the original, but varies slightly in toppings. In order to reduce the amount of carbs, the bun was removed and the burger is served wrapped in iceberg lettuce leaves. The amount of ketchup was also reduced. The burger is also topped with mustard, mayo, cheese, tomato, red onion and dill pickles. The result is 49 fewer grams of carbohydrates.

The Hardee’s Low Carb Thickburger is served in a paper “half wrap” and comes in its own cardboard carton, both of which make eating a lettuce-wrapped, bunless burger a much easier task than would be the case with typical fast-food packaging.

And how many calories? Doesn’t matter. It’s meat – and more meat = bigger penis according to the market metrics.

This is the Viagra strategy, which Falafel Bill O’Reilly, Fox News, and many other low-rent products use to great effect. It works – so why shouldn’t it work for fast-food?

All you wannabe Instawankers rolling up to the drive thru in your stars ‘n bars-tricked-out, fat-tyred pickups – yeah you, you who think that by eating a squashed, oozing mountain of industrial fats glued together with cow-tails, hooves, and testicles you’re bucking the liberal trend and striking a blow for the little (in all senses of the word) man… Hey Sucker! You’ve been had, but you won’t really know it till your first heart attack, when you can’t afford healthcare.

I have to say that thing looks bloody vile. With all that dripping fat I’d be heaving before I got my second mouthful down.

But then I don’t have a tiny penis.

Read MoreFood Blogging, Fast Food, Burgers, Burger King, Bad Nutrition, Marketing, Public Health, Impotence, Viagra, Fox News, Falafel, O’Reilly

Published by Palau

Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt, washed the t-shirt 23 times, threw the t-shirt in the ragbag, now I'm polishing furniture with it.